I’ll write a few things down as I think of them.

I’ve been thinking, from time to time, about my mistakes in the early 2000s, when I wrote commentary on the scriptures and thought that the best thing I could possibly do is to push the absolute limits of my spiritual perception and understanding, in order to be able to write things down – the exact yoga techniques to be used, the exact levels of purity required for certain things, and so on. This was such an incredibly naive and autistic view of things, I cringe every time I think of it. That would have been absolutely useless, and it reflected only my own desire to do the absolute maximum while I’m incarnated – touch the utmost limits, write it all down in form of manuals for the future generations of yogis, convey my knowledge to students who will establish a living tradition, so that I would check every possible box and God would let me out on good behaviour. 🙂 Occasionally, reality would snap me out of it; for instance, I used to say some of it out loud in front of one of the students, how I would like to have a yacht in order to be able to go to some completely desolate rock at sea, where I would be as far away from humans as possible in order to be able to do things that require long, uninterrupted streams of consciousness; it’s hard for me to even describe how those things work because of the limitations of language. Basically, imagine striking and keeping a single “note” of energy/emotion/consciousness, very narrow in “frequency”, the way a laser or LED light of a single wavelength is in the spectrum of light, observing what exactly it does in the energy system, how to cause it, how to remove impurities, how to maintain it, how to turn it into something else, and how to extinguish it. The guy I talked to (actually talked to myself with him around, apparently) concluded that this is certain evidence that I’m spiritually fallen because why would anyone want a yacht if not for hookers and cocaine. It sounds funny as hell now, in a sense where you can imagine a mathematician talking about fields and trees to a farmer, who keeps trying to understand what fields this guy is ploughing and what kind of trees he’s growing, but I didn’t find it funny then – I didn’t find it anything, in fact. My reaction was a blank lack of understanding, a total disconnect between what I thought their problems were and how I can help them overcome them, and what their problems actually were and how they understand the world around them. I don’t think it’s necessarily bad, mind you. I think it’s actually good that people are confronted with someone who exists in a way so different from them, it pulls them out of what they think is reality and what they think is “normal”, because you can’t really guide one gradually from one to another by explaining it “in their language”. You can’t explain yoga to a whore using her “language” of pimps, drug dealers and “clients”. You need to snap them out of their world and show them that “their world” is basically a form of madness and garbage unworthy of attention. The problem is, if it doesn’t work, the whore will think pranayama and vipassana are some forms of kinky sex from Kama Sutra, and conclude you want to fuck her for free, and I would guess that this, oversimplified as it might be, is in fact close enough to the root cause of the issues arising when a very real guru is trying to teach what is usually described as “normal people”. A “normal person”, from a position of a yogi, is caught in a whirlpool of insane delusion and attachment, completely ignorant of all reality, with consciousness that looks like content of a garbage can mixed in a blender. From a position of a “normal person”, a yogi’s motivations are completely incomprehensible, and they keep trying to translate his words into their language of hooker-drug dealer-pimp-cocaine-blowjob-get paid-buy drugs. The difference between a really fucked up human and a human that is so good they are a potential student candidate is, basically, in how long the garbage was left in the sun before it was put in a blender. That, I think, would be hardest for people to understand – that I didn’t really think that my students were anything special; I thought I could basically take anyone who wants to listen, show them the direction and the technique, and if they practiced it enough, things would start happening that would basically lead them towards enlightenment, one step at a time, where after a few steps your position is quite different from anything conceivable at the starting point. Also, I didn’t care if what they thought and felt is “true”; I only cared about the energy frequency and intensity, and whether it’s pointed vertically or not. You see, people in general have very weird notions of what’s true, that basically assume their general picture of reality is valid, and if something deviates from it, it’s false. A yogi, however, knows that only God is real, everything else is comparable to some video game, that is to say it is a persistent, convincing illusion, humans are energetically trapped by investing energy within the illusion, and trying to feed off of diminished reflections of their own energetic investments, and it’s all insanity, it is all false. It doesn’t really matter whether you believe that the sky is blue or yellow; a yogi perceives your beliefs as either useful, if they can cause you to disentangle yourself from the illusion, or harmful, if they promote further entanglement. In a very real way, a yogi knows that God is true, everything else is falsehood and nonsense, and whether you believe in fairies or electrons, it’s all the same to him. If you believe in fairies, he’ll try to talk to you in terms of fairies, if you believe in physics he’ll improvise something in terms of quarks and protons, but what’s actually important to know is that a yogi doesn’t really believe in any of that nonsense, he’s just trying to speak to the patients of a lunatic asylum in some way that would influence their energy system in a positive way, and turn the garbage smoothy in their minds into a coherent-ecstatic energy flow.

I get flashbacks of this when I hear the Russians explaining their position, and then I hear the Americans and their vassals interpret that, translating Yoga Sutra into pimp-hooker language. It’s actually funny in a weird sort of a way.

Putin: “Stop trying to make a dirty bomb, it’s going to escalate into a nuclear war.”
Brandon: “If Putin doesn’t want nuclear war, why is he talking about it so much?”

FML 🙂