What is the fundamental nature of this world? What is it, in its essence?

I don’t care about convincing the materialists who believe it’s reality, whose building-blocks are particles and forces. It’s not that I think there are no particles and forces; I just think that this universe is virtual, and its forces and particles are arbitrary. They are a consequence of the design parameters. Essentially, when you make a simulation, you first need to clarify your purpose with it, then you need to formulate ways in which this purpose is to be realized, and then you look for the means. The way I think the whole thing was made is that someone stated what kind of a universe-type he wants, the way videogame creators sit down and decide whether they want to make Candy Crush, Crysis or Witcher. Then they design the “universe” as either cartoonish, realistic (emulating the physical world) or fantastic (with magic and weird laws). Only after that’s done, the coders figure out ways in which it can be done, basically by either writing or using an existing game engine. If the engine is well done, it can allow you to explore the in-game universe without constantly bumping into the limits. Bad engines in the 1990 showed heavy pixelation when you approached the walls and other surfaces. Modern engines no longer do that, they show you detailed textures. Eventually, you get to the subatomic particles in one direction, and stars in other, if the virtual reality engine is good enough. That’s why those don’t interest me all that much. Their existence tells you either that the VR engine is well made and that part of its purpose is to pretend to be the actual reality, or that it is the actual reality. I didn’t make my conclusion based on the knowledge of physics, or lack thereof. I made it by observing things that don’t fit neatly into physics, and trying to figure the necessary prerequisites for their existence. But that’s another story. Essentially, I studied physics in 1992, and when it clicked that this universe is software and not hardware, that it’s an arbitrary specific case of a simulation, of a virtual reality, I ended my study and started concerning myself with other things, such as “now what?”.

That this reality is not primary is actually a common theme in Hinduism. Buddhism formulates things in a somewhat different way but leans in the same direction, with its understanding that there are many world-types and that a soul can reincarnate in any of them, according to its karmic structure. Christianity understands the concept of world-types, defining two basic ones, the material and the spiritual, where spiritual is then further divided into heaven and hell, and sometimes purgatory. The way religions see those many different worlds varies; some understand them as separated spaces, and some understand them as overlapping realities, or dimensions of the same reality.

I have a much more intricate way of looking at it, because I have experience with computers and operating systems, which all provide good analogies of layered, complex systems. For instance you have UNIX, which gives you different views of the system depending on whether you’re a user or an administrator. Also, you have the filesystem with various directories, mountpoints and files, and you have the running processes. Only later do you have the graphical layer, the x-windows, and window-managers with themes that make it presentable to the user. So, in theory, on the same computer you can have different user-experiences, simultaneously, and one user can play a videogame, another can watch a movie, and another can edit a picture. There are common services running in the system-space with root permissions, which a user cannot change, and which form the basis for what is possible within the userspace. On the next layer, you have applications which have their own laws, and differ greatly from each other, for instance a word processor from a realistic universe-simulation or a cartoonish videogame. Today, with our modern computers, it’s quite easy to make those analogies and to explain the virtual-universe theory. However, the people who first figured this out thousands of years ago had nothing but dreams to explain it with; they pointed out how dreams can appear to be completely real once you’re dreaming, but once you wake up they look like an illusion and something else looks like reality. Once the Matrix movie came out, those analogies went into main-stream and became ubiquitous and overused, but this movie never really makes you think in the right direction or makes the proper implications.

Based on the way an application interfaces with the user, you can make conclusions about the intents of its designer. A simulated chess board has obvious intent – it’s a way for the user to play chess with the computer without using a physical board. A console-driven image resizing tool also has obvious intent; it is to be used either directly or within scripts in order to create smaller versions of larger images, for either thumbnails or web display. An interactive global map with satellite imagery also has obvious intent and purpose behind it. Same with a moderately realistic videogame.

However, with some applications the intent is not as clear. Witcher 3, for instance, is such a realistic, deep game, it’s more of a fantasy and an alternate life for the player, than merely a game. It’s a combination of a game, an interactive movie in which you decide how the plot goes, and a way to explore an alternative universe. The intent of the game is to connect you to the emotions of the fictional characters. It has intent very similar to the emotionally dramatic movies or music, only more immersive, because you are included in the plot and the decisions are yours, so you emotionally claim them. You can be loyal or betray friends. You can save one person or another. You can help strangers or ignore them. You can stay out of politics or participate in a plot to kill a mad king. You can marry a woman who constantly bosses you around and annoys you, or one who is willing to go through sewers with you. You can kill a witch who manipulated you or offer her sanctuary. Essentially, you can make the kind of decisions that determine the character and the course of one’s life. This makes it not-really-a-game, because the decisions you make there might actually be karmically formative.

The motive for the game designers seems to be to influence your emotions and provide a genuinely immersive experience. However, what if someone pushed that far enough? Let’s say someone wanted to create an experience so immersive, you wouldn’t be able to tell it’s not “real”, whatever “real” meant, because anything you can experience is real, in a way. Witcher is real, in a way, but you know it’s a game. It’s real because it influences your thoughts and emotions, it’s real because you can experience it and participate in it, but it’s not real the same way your computer is real. It’s easy to say that something is an illusion, but if something leaves tracks in the snow, it’s certainly real, regardless of its actual nature. But if you can’t tell it’s a game, it’s a whole different phenomenon. In order to make something appear to be the reality, you need to block someone from perceiving anything beyond the scope of the simulation. You need to block sensory inputs that contradict the illusion, and you need to block all memory of existence outside the simulation. You also need to provide a convincing and gradual explanation for the experience, in a sense of “how did I get here”. The way this world works can be explained in only two ways: it’s either the reality, or it is a simulation carefully designed with the intent of pretending to be the reality.

As I said, I had my reasons for concluding the latter, and I actually had spiritual experiences confirming it in various ways. The Hindu concept of maya wasn’t just pulled out of someone’s ass; yogis formulated this concept thousands of years ago as a result of similar spiritual experiences. It’s actually something that is verifiable, if only by people with sufficient training, or in special circumstances, such as being reanimated after clinical death. But that’s always so – travel to the Moon was also accessible only to the few, and in limited special circumstances. Higgs boson is only verifiable in special circumstances and in a very limited way. The concept that everyone is able to verify everything anytime in science is nonsense. Only a few specialists can verify each others’ claims, and the rest are in a position to choose whom to believe. You can believe the Apollo astronauts, or you can believe the conspiracy theorists. And regarding the nature of reality, the materialists are in the position of the conspiracy theorists, because they need to explain why the “astronauts” are either liars, or insane. I see complete equivalence; however, it’s beside the scope of this article. I’m not trying to explain the exact reasons why I believe this place is virtual. I’m also not trying to convince those who believe otherwise. I’m explaining my line of thinking after I established that this place is virtual, to those who might have similar understanding.

My problem was that it is very difficult to assume that the person designing this place had good intentions. It has all the qualities of a combination of a trap and a prison. What it does is limit you, wipe your memory, and throw you at the mercy of others. It forces you into a very limited tree of options, where most are fatal and you tend to avoid them, and those that are not fatal are spiritually corruptive. It’s very easy to see this as a result of bad intent, and quite difficult to see it as a result of good intent. In fact, I tried very very hard for years to find ways to interpret it as a result of good intent, because the alternative was emotionally unbearable. For instance, you can see this place as a gym, as a place where you lift artificial weights in a controlled environment with the intent of growing your muscles. However, this attempt fails on the inspection of the results. If this place is intended to produce spiritual growth, it fails miserably. In fact, the souls that come out of this place are in worse condition than when they went in. All are traumatized, most are damaged, some are even outright destroyed. Basically, this world teaches you that there is no God (at least not the kind that can help you in any tangible way), that it is more useful for accumulating power to persuade and coerce others than to work on magnifying your own resources. It teaches you limitation and separation from God. It doesn’t teach you to overcome those things, it teaches you that they cannot be overcome in any way, and that you need to simply assume them and work around them. Essentially, it’s similar to LSD, which inhibits your normal neural pathways and forces your brain to establish alternative ones, basically forcing you to see dragons and talk to garden gnomes while ignoring traffic on the street, and those new patterns very quickly supplant and replace the normal ones, turning you into an utterly dysfunctional individual completely incapable of functioning in the real world. So, essentially, the way LSD fucks you up in this world, this world fucks you up for functioning in any kind of a real world that I actually experienced. Essentially, it teaches you to treat social networking, control of resources, societal and natural laws as if they are of supreme importance for survival and prosperity, while at the same time reducing your personal connection with God to the level of religion, of something you can’t base technology on, something that doesn’t feed you, give you protection or provide knowledge and growth.

In the astral world-type, God is the source of light. God is the source of knowledge. God is the source of “technology”, the way of doing things, of making structures and artifacts and spiritual entities. God is the source of nourishment, energy that refreshes the being, gives it strength and focus and energy. In higher world-types, you already learned to see yourself as God, as an aspect of That Reality, because you progressed beyond astral constraints by understanding that God is within, and that it’s your more real self, and you ceased to see God as a source of energy for yourself and your endeavors, instead seeing yourself as a manifested aspect of God, so you no longer draw light from God, you are the light of God. So, this is where the idea about this world as a gym, as a place where you train under extreme load in order to be able to function better in the real world mater, falls flat on its face. If you train to rely on everything but God, your inner instincts grow deformed. You learn to do things the way it’s opposite from useful in the real world, where you find yourself after death. You learn to communicate wrong, you learn to judge things and people wrong, you get to have wrong ideas about what it takes to move forward, and you basically need to un-learn everything you learned here in order to get where you were before you were born in this place. It reminds me of trying to learn how to use rollerblades. Knowing how to walk or how to run doesn’t help. Knowing how to ride a bike doesn’t help. You basically have to pretend you’re walking on ice and learn a completely different way of moving, turning and stopping, and every time you rely on your reflexes, on your normal way of reacting to something, you are in danger of falling. So, you learn how to skate on those, and this skill is useful only for skating. It doesn’t help you walk better, it doesn’t help you do anything else, it’s not universal, and once you remove the skates you’re not much improved, and all that at a price of high probability of injury during practice.

This is a rather unpleasant line of thought, and opens some relevant questions, such as why does such an evil place exist, and who ordered its creation? What was the intent behind it, and why was it allowed? Essentially, why did God allow this abomination to be created, and why did he not put an end to it? There are actually several good explanations, one by the Cathari, and the other by a Christian psychic by the name of Katarina, and put forward by B.D.Benedikt. The Cathari explanation is that this world was created by Satan as an evil mockery, and that God created the Heaven as the real world, and Satan created this world to entrap souls and divert them from God. Katarina’s explanation is that Satan didn’t really create this world because he lacks the ability, but it was he who seduced the souls into following him here, away from God, by tricking them into believing that this world will provide them with the necessary kind of experiences due to which they will evolve and become like God. Also, there’s the Yazidi belief that this world is under the authority of the “Peacock Angel”, the Theosophical belief that this world is governed by Sanat Kumar, and Jesus’ belief that this world is given at least temporarily into the power of Satan, “the prince of this world”. Buddha said that this world is governed by Mara, a Satan-like entity that tries to entangle beings here and make them perpetual slaves. Essentially, I can’t really think of many religions that believe that this world is actually governed by God, and yet that’s the first thing people instinctively assume, that God made this place, that He’s in charge, and therefore that He’s ultimately responsible for all the horrible things that take place here.

I started making progress in my thinking once I allowed myself to stop assuming that God had to be ultimately responsible and in power over everything. Once I did that, I allowed myself to accept the possibility that something is really fucked up and wrong, without automatically blaming God for it. On the other hand, I literally saw God under the thin layer of illusion that is this world. I couldn’t pretend that this world is the reality, or that God had nothing to do with it. In fact, I could more easily argue that this world has no other existence, but as an idea within God’s mind. Yet, this world is a completely fucked up mockery. It’s as if it was designed by Satan, and yet it is maintained by God. This makes no sense unless you stop thinking about those things in religious terms, and start thinking about them in terms of software and operating systems. Someone created the computer. Someone else created the operating system. Someone else bought the computer, installed the operating system, and applies both to some super-crazy and harmful purpose. It’s wrong to ask whether the computers are evil, whether the designers of the hardware and the OS are evil, and why they allow it. Sometimes, things just happen because they can. You wouldn’t think that the result of all the smart and benevolent people inventing the computers, the software and the networking would be porn and hateful chats, but that’s how it got to be used by the end-users. You give them something, and the first thing they test is whether they can eat it, fuck it or whack someone with it.

So, what something ends up being used for is not necessarily by design, and it’s not necessarily condoned by those who made the system. Hell, if you host a botnet and use it to DDOS someone, it’s not necessarily even known by the owners of the actual machines that have the bots installed on them, and even if they knew about it, it’s questionable whether they could turn them off. So, we need to understand that some things can be the result of abuse, and that some form of abuse cannot be easily prevented or stopped by the people whom you expect to be in charge.

So, I gradually worked on disentangling this unholy mess and both figuring out how this came to be, and what could be done about it.

The results sound weird even to me, but here’s how the story goes. Metaphorically speaking, when God created all the relative existence, he wanted to allow the souls access to His creative ability, in cases where they would lack the power and knowledge to create a different world-type. Essentially, it’s like leaving a computer terminal accessible to those who are granted access by the librarian, so that they could access the books in the library. You assume that the librarian will be able to figure out who has honest intentions, and who is there only for mischief, and you assume that people are in the library for honest purposes, especially if nobody before did anything wrong. The security tends to be lax and superficial. So, let’s say this is a special library, and the computer terminal is more akin to the way David Bowman communicates with HAL 9000. You have some kind of an access point from which a superior intelligence interfaces with you and gets your orders. Let’s say this intelligence is merely a thin wrapper over God’s intent and power, directed to serve some specific purpose. Let’s say it’s designed and ordered by God to do what the people authorized by the librarian ordered it to do, without passing judgment. Let’s say this intelligence can create a new world-type as easily as you can open a text document on your computer, or, more precisely, it can be ordered to create a new application to process a new type of document, which is neither text nor music nor video, but for instance a web page containing all of the above. Let’s say it can be ordered to design a music player that inherits all the properties of a normal music player, but instead of playing sound on the speakers, it can print the waveform on a plotter. Or it can be designed to play movies as ASCII graphics. You get the picture. You don’t need to be much of a programmer in order to create apparently spectacular results. What you need is access to this power, an existing template to modify, and a few sentences of instructions. You can essentially be a very limited being, in both spiritual grasp and in power, and yet you can wield God’s power to create universes. Just imagine today’s kids with smartphones – they’re as stupid as rocks, to the point where some believe the Earth is flat, and yet they have a supercomputer in their pocket which triangulates their location from either the base stations or the geostationary satellites in high orbit, completely without their knowledge and completely beyond their intellectual scope, and what they perceive is their position on a map. Essentially, it is today possible to use tools that are both smarter and more capable than yourself, at least in some things, and so it shouldn’t be all that difficult to understand what I’m trying to describe.

So, in order for this nightmare to take place, several things needed to happen. First, God needed to assume that the beings would create other Universe-types in order to explore His infinite creativity, to experience things that would not be as easy in the worlds He created; and he needed to assume good intentions and good behavior, because obviously, according to the karmic law any abuse would have had grave consequences which nobody in his right mind would want to endure. Then, he had to appoint a guardian to limit access to such capability, and He had to trust his judgment and experience. There would then have to be a being which is seriously messed up spiritually, who wanted to prove some very psychotic theory, who is so crazy that he actually believes his theory to be the better way, something that is an improvement upon God’s ideas. Finally, the guardian needs not to take this shit seriously, and to agree on terms that seem OK to him, but which allow terrible things to take place, all the while locking out anyone else, preventing any interruption, or basically anything that’s not agreed with the abuser. And finally, there needs to be a way for the abuser to hide his true intent, and present his intent as noble and righteous, because otherwise the karmic law would break his plan.

So, it’s a death by thousand cuts – it wasn’t that anyone actually agreed for this place to be created. The intent was obscured by snipping it into smaller requests that seemed legitimate and were approved, and the perfect storm was created with the very assumptions that abuse could be detected and prevented by the guardian, that nobody would be crazy enough to abuse the system in the first place, and that nothing could seriously go wrong simply because nothing did ever go wrong before, and even if it did, it could be stopped and fixed.

And that’s how we ended up with a situation that a Universe is created and maintained by God, but designed by Satan, and the system cannot be shut down because Satan was actually given permission by the authorized person, so basically God gave His word to make something possible, and Satan defined “something” with only a few commands, quite basic and non-elaborate, having neither the knowledge nor power to create something like this. But, he could tell the Universe-spawning intelligence to take the astral universe-template, to modify certain parameters, such as limiting personal connection with God, capping personal power to a very narrow band, and forcing interpersonal interaction. “The Crystal”, as I call this Universe-engine, then took those parameters and created the set of necessary initial prerequisites for it to be set in motion; things like particles and forces, and the specific density modification on the astral template that was used. As such, this entire Universe was created in its final form, from beginning to end, the way you can have an entire movie in a file, from start to end, and it’s only connected with once someone watches it, and it could be connected in a certain way and from a certain time-interval; essentially, you cannot incarnate here at a timepoint where the stars haven’t yet formed, or the Earth is still liquid, or there is no life, or life is too primitive to be of interest. But, things can be set up at the control aperture, somewhere in the astral world, in a way that if you start thinking about this place and about ways in which you would live a life here, this is seen as acceptance of terms for incarnation, and as a request to find the closest-matching incarnation possible to live through your chosen experience. Essentially, it’s like a black hole that draws you in if you come close, where “coming close” is defined in terms of merely thinking about it. It’s a nightmare of the worst kind, and this was defined in the terms agreed upon in the beginning, where the “librarian” agreed that everybody must be allowed to join this world, and nothing must be done to prevent it. The librarian saw nothing wrong with the request, but he simply assumed that everybody will be allowed to leave at will, too, as it was always the case everywhere else. Which shows you how simple and reasonable assumptions can be the mothers of all fuckups.

So, how old is this Universe? I honestly don’t know. Time within it is irrelevant, since time as such would exist only as observer-time. You can’t say that a movie file on your hard drive is 3 hours long, you can say it’s 1.5GB big. You can say it has a potential for subjective time-expenditure of 3 hours, if the viewer connects with it and watches it at normal speed from start to end. Before the first souls connected with this Universe-type, its “age” was irrelevant, since it was probably created from start to end in its final form in an instant. From the position of The Crystal, it could observe it as something that exists completely beyond our in-Universe understanding of time and space. It was a movie file on a hard drive, which was created in an instant in its final form, and since it wasn’t yet watched by anyone, the notion of time related to it was meaningless. You could jump to the beginning, where you have a huge particle explosion from singularity, jump to the middle where you have the stars producing increasingly heavier elements, jump some more and you have the evolution of life, and who knows how it all ends; I know only that it ends, that a fixed ending was agreed upon as one of the terms that Satan had to accept in order to gain access.

So, what are the fundamental constituents of this Universe? Atoms, protons, quarks, bosons? Those are to this Universe what pixels are to a videogame. They are the tiniest parts you can see. The true fundamental constituents are a wish for God to stay away and not “interfere”, a wish to live a life without God, an to create an illusion that individual evolution towards God doesn’t matter.

Being forced into things that happen to you against your will is more of a fundamental property of this world than gravity. Gravity is here only because it was part of the solution-set required to create the world without God. It is incidental. But hatred towards God, that’s what this world is all about. It’s here to prove that God can create nothing so good, that Satan couldn’t fuck it up and turn it into its opposite.

I once mentioned that I’m not an egalitarian, but you would probably assume wrong if you tried to guess the rationale behind this. You see, I’ve seen more diversity in souls, human or otherwise, than you could possibly imagine. Especially, I’ve seen diversity in souls that inhabit a similar body type; for instance, in a “young European woman” body type I’ve seen everything from completely generic, unformed low-astral structures, in great variety of structures and shapes, high-astral (some would call them mental) very sophisticated structures sometimes bordering on outright vajra initiation, and outright Gods on the extreme end – structures that use vajras, not only blue but even higher, as “ornaments”, while the spiritual body itself is of much higher quality, which you can’t imagine before having actually seen it. Also, within the spectrum of very similar body types I’ve seen huge variety in intelligence, from “stupid as fuck”, to “genius”, and in character, from “Satan’s asshole” to “aspect of God”. You can’t be an egalitarian if you’ve seen all this. Also, I’ve seen huge differences in typical soul-types between India and Europe. Obviously, incarnation is not a random thing. You don’t just randomly incarnate somewhere. This doesn’t mean that soul-type strictly follows a racial or a cultural group, but I did notice strong patterns. For instance, after getting used to the soul-types prevalent in India, I was shocked at the much greater sophistication and complexity of the ordinary Italians in the airport in Rome.

You would expect that the ability to see this would be exciting or entertaining. I assure you, for the most part it’s the exact opposite, because the statistical distribution of soul-types seems to follow a Gaussian pattern, which means that most of what I see is a very simplistic, coarse type that doesn’t differ greatly from the soul-types I saw in animals. In very rare cases you see something that’s not actually animalistic, demonic or disgusting. As you can imagine, observing all this, all the time, gave me my wonderful optimism regarding human nature. 🙂 Seeing the same energy-structure in a man and in a dog makes it quite impossible for me to see humans in general as my equals; if anything, I define my equal in terms of a soul-type, not a body-type.

Since, obviously, in the spiritual worlds there are no material laws, we cannot measure the spiritual powers in material units. This, however, doesn’t mean that laws and limitations don’t apply.

One of the limitations is that a being cannot harm another being to the extent greater than the harm it was inflicted upon by that same being. In practice, this means that the very laws of the spiritual world take form of an invisible shield that protects beings from harm, and the only way to invalidate this shield is to sin against another being, in which case this being can retaliate, but only to the justified extent, after which retaliation no longer “goes through”. You will now ask how is it possible for an offence to take place at all if harm is forbidden by the very fabric of reality, but it’s possible. For instance, if someone attempts an obvious use of force against someone’s will, that won’t work. However, if one gives permission and his limits are exceeded, this is a form of harm. We can use sex as an example – you cannot rape someone, but you can exceed the limits of acceptable during consensual sex, and this form of harm can be retaliated against, but one cannot over-compensate.

From this, it is obvious that the main form of harmful attack is performed by trickery and illusion, by luring someone into accepting something that turns out to be harmful. This is nothing new – in Hindu scriptures, this was elaborated in great volume, and it was illustrated how even the Gods can be tricked into granting blessings that can be abused and become a source of great trouble, because once a God gives his word, he is bound by it and cannot rescind it. This allows for recursive complexity, for instance a God grants a blessing to another, lesser being, to grant or refuse access to some holy artefact. This being can be tricked more easily than God, but his grant has the power of God’s own word. Also, the artefact in question can have power greater than its guardian, and the consequences of granted access can go far beyond the scope of guardian’s normal powers and responsibilities. My highest-probability estimate is that this is how this world happened to be created. There’s a special artefact, which is basically a spiritual jewel which was crated as a remnant of God’s will in touch with the Creation, which was to grant the ability to the spiritual beings to manifest their creativity by spawning alternative realities, basically creating the modified laws under which new “universes” can be spawned. Since, obviously, one can’t be allowed to access this thing just like that, some worthy spiritual being was appointed to approve or deny requests for its use. This jewel, let’s say that it’s basically God’s power to create Universes, to control their local space and time, to adjust their laws, and this ability is bound by the desire for the beings to evolve and know God. This jewel was both created by God, and is an aspect of God, which is and isn’t separate from God. Basically, like all high spiritual realities, it contains its own paradoxes. If you will, you can call it the world engine – it’s something akin to an infinitely powerful computer which can render an infinite number of discrete Universes, inhabited by countless spiritual beings, and create realities which are both illusory and real – illusory because only God is real, and real because they can be objectively perceived and tested in all kinds of ways.

Since this jewel isn’t astral in its nature, only a control aperture (my term for this structure, BTW) is located in the astral world, and this control aperture is like a “pointer” to a memory location in programming terminology, or a ssh terminal with root access to the server. If the control aperture is closed, the astral world loses access to the jewel. However, it is the will of God for the jewel to be accessible to the spiritual beings with legitimate claims, which creates and maintains the control aperture, which is guarded by an elder.

How this person got to be appointed to the role, I don’t know. I do know, however, that there was no precedent of misuse, and that he was not inherently suspicious of requests. The problem with Sanat Kumar is that he seems to have been insane, in the sense that he didn’t differentiate between reality and his wishes, and one can’t really tell whether he’s lying. When Sanat Kumar tells you he has a wonderful plan which will create a new way for souls to evolve more quickly, under more compassionate laws, where the majority of those who would otherwise be lost would be redeemed and attain unity with each other and God, he really believes it. There seems to have been something suspicious about it, since he was granted access to the “world engine”, but in a limited way. Also, there were negotiations. He had to accept a time limit. However, he was granted non-disclosure on the exact amount of the limit; so, nobody but him and God can know the exact date of expiration. The existence of the time limit is not protected, however; one can be told that it exists. Anyone is allowed to enter his creation and experience it, by accepting his rules upon entry. I do know that I had a very good idea that it would end very badly, despite the fact that the specifics of the world’s ruleset were not known at the time. I also know that my objection was disregarded by the guardian. You can guess the rest. It all ended badly, and since the thing couldn’t be deactivated from the outside (God gave his word, remember?), some beings attempted to at least help the trapped ones from the inside, in turn becoming trapped, and attracting others who tried to help them.

So, basically, God didn’t directly grant permission for this shithole to be created. In fact, its creation and nature are so immensely against God’s will, that the guardian of the aperture apparently died – the last thing I can feel from him is great remorse, sorrow and regret for allowing this horror of horrors to take place. However, since it was his right to basically sign off on requests with God’s authority, the permission still holds.

You can see the problem. Apparently, in the astral world you can lie if you’re crazy enough to believe you’re telling the truth. Also, if you really believe that something will prove to be better than God’s design, you are believed to be acting in good intention. And God didn’t interfere much, because free will and creativity would be impossible if he immediately blocked everything he didn’t like. The analogy with sex is valid – you accept to bring someone to your bedroom, and if that person turns out to be a psychopath who starts doing crazy and disgusting shit during sex, you can regret it, but you’re fucked anyway. You can’t become un-fucked by wishing it.

I heard an argument why this world couldn’t have been created by Satan, and that’s argument by beauty: essentially, the world contains beautiful things, which Satan couldn’t have created. This argument assumes that Satan couldn’t simply copy and modify a previous structure, inheriting most of the design. Also, I myself made the argument that any being who would be qualified for the role of a devil couldn’t possibly exceed the astral level of initiation, and creation of this world required at least causal level of ability, which is a requirement for modifying the astral mahat-tattva. This argument is much better, and I discovered the basic mechanism that made this possible only recently, and only after years of unmasking layer after layer of deceptions and information-blocks. This world is a paradox – it was created by God, and it truly exists only within God’s spirit, because that’s basically what the jewel is. It’s the intent within God’s spirit to make certain forms of creativity and will-expression possible for the spiritual beings who are below God-level of initiation. Also, the ruleset which was used to create this world started from the astral template, which Sanat Kumar modified, by ordering the jewel to produce a certain kind of results. He was constrained by the necessity of staying true to the wording of the request that he made, and which was granted, so he couldn’t deviate too much into outright evil. Instead, he used ambiguity, things that will be defensible as if having been made in good intent, but which would certainly or almost certainly produce evil. The keyword was “temptation”, because you supposedly cannot show how good you are unless you are presented with a viable temptation for you to refuse or accept. The wording of his commands was such, that he managed to evade punishment for quite a while, and was only caught when he let his guard down for a fraction of a second, when he was completely sure that utmost victory was achieved.

Why am I telling you all this? I’m doing it to illustrate the dangers of the spiritual world. The danger is in consent. Your free will is supreme. Nobody can hurt you or force you against your will. However, with your consent, absolutely anything is possible. You can be deceived, trapped, hurt and destroyed to the last kalapa. In the world based on willpower, idea, consciousness and form, the creative power of a command, or a permission, is not to be underestimated. So, basically, you need to be very careful in the wording of your “spells”, because they are binding contracts. Accepting surprises is potentially deadly. Giving others permission to show you “something” is potentially deadly. Always give yourself the ability to cancel your permission or acceptance of anything at any point if it turns out to be unacceptable. Never allow anything that will modify or inhibit your memory, so that you can’t recall what you accepted or the terms according to which acceptance can be revoked. Why is it relevant? Because you were attracted by something that felt wonderful, for instance a display of the best moments of your potential life, showing you moments of sexual delight or great achievement and satisfaction, and you said “I want that”, you were asked to sign off on a contract which says that you accept all responsibility, that you will hold everyone blameless for any possible adverse consequences of your experience, that you accept the rules of the game, and that you acknowledge that you were informed that what you were shown was an incomplete experience, where only the positive achievements were displayed, but everything you were shown was true. And the next thing you know is that you opened your eyes in an ob-gyn ward, not knowing who you are and how you got here, but wanting to go back to the good place which you could no longer remember.

To be honest, a good number of you reading this are nowhere near that stupid, and you are here because you knew exactly what you’re getting yourselves into, and why. Most of you know who you are.

With spiritual bodies, there are two main considerations: quality and quantity, or, in other words, how sophisticated the substance and structure are, and how big it is. A computer equivalent of this is estimating a CPU’s power by knowing what technological generation it belongs to, and how fast it’s clocked. The more sophisticated technology gives the greatest advantage, and within that, the greater clock speed the better. Comparing “size” alone, in this case clock speed, doesn’t tell you anything valuable. In spiritual terms, comparing spiritual beings by size gives you an important information only if you first look at the quality of structure, which primarily means the energy level and density of the substance it’s made of. One vajra-jewel might “unzip” into entire universes of astral substance, and yet it might look small, the same way a black hole or a neutron star might look small, yet its structure reveals the truth. It’s like comparing mainframe computers from the 1980s with the smartphones of today; an old mainframe is physically imposing but the smartphone is actually more powerful, because it’s all about structure. However, if you build a mainframe system out of modern building blocks, it will have the same power per litre of volume compared to the smartphone, and greater volume will produce linearly more power. This is what I mean by comparing quality first, and quantity second.

So, let’s imagine that physical volume units can be assigned to astral entities, which is not the case but I don’t know how else to formulate this so that it would make sense. A gaseous-form being with a volume of one litre is lesser than a gaseous-form being with a volume of ten litres, all else being same. However, one millilitre of crystal-form being might be greater than an arbitrarily large gaseous-form – and here I mean planetary sizes, because the quality is different and it’s like comparing ordinary matter which is mostly empty space, and comparing neutronium, which is nucleon-density, zero empty space. My observation, when undergoing initiation into vajra 20 years ago, was that the relation between ordinary astral substance and vajra is even more extreme than the relation between rarified gas and a black hole. So, the thing to have in mind is that when I speak of spiritual jewels, or vajra-stuff, it relates to astral matter like black holes relate to cooky jars. It’s literally mind-boggling density. I had the misfortune to have to deal with some corrupted spiritual jewels (yes, that can happen), and that’s the most wicked and malignant shit you can imagine. I’m not sure what’s the physics behind the corruption, but I do know that the creators of the jewels pledged them to Sanat Kumar, and something happened to them which corrupted their entire mass. Not only is that shit bad, it also caused accidents, when my girls cast a glance with their astral vision to see what the hell was it that wrecked my system so badly, and a few kalapas of that substance transferred into their astral bodies, and I had the opportunity to watch what happens when a trained yogi with years of experience dealing with all sorts of bad shit gets struck by that. It’s like watching microscopic black holes tearing through matter. Nothing they could do with astral spell-casting and shielding had any effect, because the “mass” of that shit was too great, although it looked like only a few particles. I had to intervene and transform those particles myself. Basically, if you can imagine black dust that’s as sharp as diamond dust, and as massive as singularity, and simply shreds through everything due to its mass, you get the idea. One kalapa of this substance expands into entire nightmare-worlds of ordinary astral stuff. The expansion rate is huge. I didn’t measure it, because I don’t have any quantifiable metrics at my disposal, but it’s like that zip-bomb file, which is a few kilobytes large but when you unzip it, it expands into terabytes of data, that was used in the BBS era to break a BBS when it tried to unpack the transmission. In order to deal with this kind of stuff you need to have the capacity to move the particles of this matter, in its compressed form, to “order” them around, to orderly decompose them into constituents of lower magnitude, and absorb and transform them in that state.

Why am I talking about this? Because I sometimes mention the spiritual jewels, and I know beyond doubt that almost everybody routinely misunderstands that, thinking that it’s some “normal” but “prettier” form of astral matter, like diamonds are a prettier form of coal. No, it’s not like that. Those “jewels” are not astral matter, they are supercompressed to the point of being another form of matter entirely. The world “causal” is usually thrown around in this context, because that’s how Vedanta classifies things – matter, astral, causal – but I’m not convinced that it makes much sense. Aurobindo’s term, “supramental”, is definitely more accurate, because this is substance that is superior to the mental plane (or, high astral, as I would more accurately name it). The way a black hole is physical matter compressed to such an extent that it goes beyond what matter is normally supposed to do, compressing a whole star into a mathematical point, while retaining its mass. How that works, nobody really knows. Also, in theory vajra is not supposed to be corruptible, although there are marginal scenarios which make it theoretically possible. For instance, if you have a being whose spiritual body is still astral, but contains spiritual jewels, this being as a whole can incarnate in the physical world, be deceived into thinking that this world was created by God, and pledge its spiritual powers and merits to the world’s creator and his intents with this world. I don’t know the actual process of commitment that ought to have been followed in order for such a claim to hold, but I know the aftermath – such beings appear to have been consumed into powering evil, and the jewels were so corrupted, probably due to the fact that they powered immensely sinful deeds such as deceiving other souls by providing a source of false attraction within this world, they had to be deconstructed and transformed at the kalapa level. Essentially, other than Sanat Kumar himself, those jewels were the nastiest, most dangerous things I have ever seen, and I wish to never have such “opportunity” again.

So, we have now established that spiritual matter can exist in many qualitatively and quantitatively different forms. The next thing to understand is evolution of the soul.

The first thing to understand about this is that majority of the Eastern religions assume there’s only one path, only one goal, and that evolution is basically the process of rubber-stamping, of having a soul conform to a pre-existing template of perfection, which is then called enlightenment. It’s either nirvana, or kaivalya, or moksha, but essentially, there’s an assumption that the sinful and bound souls are all different, but that the enlightened souls are all similar, or that they simply merge into a supra-reality where they lose any kind of personal identity. But really, what would be the point of that? To have the end-point reproduce the origin? Really? I don’t think so. Instead, what seems to be happening is that the souls go through vastly different paths and formative experiences, and as a result they are all vastly different. I don’t say “vastly different” like “they are different because they haven’t evolved yet to the point of perfection”, but exactly the opposite, that they have evolved into their own version of perfection. That’s why I have a problem with religions, because they have a template of sainthood. God doesn’t have one. Spiritual development is possible through imagining complex abstract ideas and acquiring knowledge; it could be sophisticated form of love felt for some other super-being; it could be strength, courage and loyalty shown to the ideals under grave pressures and hardships. It could be observation, empathy, identification, basically samyama on other beings and structures, where one extends his consciousness in order to encompass new things and possibilities. It could be challenging the preexisting notions and limits of the known, by testing new ideas, new practices, doing new things and learning from the results. Basically, you can grow on the path of the flower, the path of the warrior, the path of an angel, the path of a saintly iconoclast, the path of a concubine, the path of a scientist, the path of a sorcerer. You can achieve perfection by growing to be God’s love, or to be God’s sword. As I said, the end-results can be as vastly different as a female beauty-love-kindness-insight, or male strength-truth-justice-brilliance. The end-result can be a saintly scholar, a lover who touched God through sexual worship, or a musician who crystallized God into sound-emotion-insights. Obviously, there is great diversity in the good; it’s the evil ones who are so similar one can’t really tell them apart, because the spiritual structure of evil is usually quite simple and rudimentary. As complexity and sophistication grow, so do the differences between the beings. It’s sad that people usually imagine God as some predictable, simple but “good” being, when God is something utterly and incredibly other. Metaphorically speaking, God is the endless vault of treasures – of beauties, of knowledges, of powers, of unimaginable things that cannot be borne by human mind and emotions, and of which human tongue cannot speak. God is not a sea in which you drown in order to become the sea, nor are you supposed to be a drop of seawater which understands that it’s the sea. No. The better analogy is that there’s an endless landscape of wonders that is God, and you can be either a macro lens to explore and record this beauty by magnification, or a wideangle lens that captures the entirety of the landscape, or a video camera that captures beauty in motion, or a sound recording device that captures the sound in its perfection, or a library that manifests tomes of precious knowledge, or a soldier who protects the precious things with his life and sword when they are endangered, or Shakti listening to Shiva explain the intricacies of Yoga. Poetically speaking, spiritual stuff condenses into crystalline vajra-form once it touches God’s perfection, and becomes a perfect “lens” that holds some of God’s perfection, in shape of an individual point of view.

(continuation from the previous article)

There are several important issues that need to be addressed regarding soul-growth and spiritual evolution.

The first is why some soul-types cannot be saved. There’s one interesting thing about astral substance, and that is its non-linear behavior in the low-energy spectrum. In high energy spectrum, when you expose an astral entity to “light”, basically to aspects of God, it absorbs them and “glows”, it is enhanced. When you expose a low-energy astral entity to the same kind of “light”, it disintegrates and “dies”. One would expect the astral particles, or kalapas, to use the proper term, to respond linearly to the influx of energy, in some predictable thermodynamic pattern, and on the level of individual kalapas, I think this is actually true, but apparently the larger structure seems to be destroyed when its constituents are exposed to the light of God that they need, and the larger structure rejects and avoids. Apparently, the individual astral kalapas refuse to put up with that shit anymore and go their own way, refusing to be bound into the darkness that is the choice of the dark entity to which they belong. As a result, when a dark spiritual entity is exposed to God’s light that is stronger than its own dark will that holds it together, the tangential momentum of the individual kalapas exceeds the already weak cohesive force of the structure, and it goes poof. Essentially, this shows that the existence of spiritual darkness is so against the basic laws of nature, that it is opposed on the kalapa level.

This law apparently holds even on the higher levels of reality, because if the level of God’s light a soul is exposed to significantly exceeds the power of its internal energy bonds, essentially if the level of love, truth and consciousness one is exposed to from the outside exceeds the level of love, truth and consciousness that bind his individual ego-structure together, he is at the risk of breaking up at the seams, metaphorically speaking, where “seams” are the weakest energy-points of his spiritual body, similar to the inclusions of weak material in a stronger rock. Those “seams” therefore limit the amount of spiritual energy one is able to take, and in order for that limit to be raised, the inclusions need to be transformed into higher-energy substance, and the disjointed fragments of the spiritual body need to be integrated. So, how does one do that?

If you’ve read the reports of the spiritual experiences of the saints, as well as the NDE experiences, which I hope you did, you will remember that the experience is usually a combination of joy and pain. Joy is because of God, and pain is because of one’s sins and flaws that light up in the consciousness as the overall energy level rises, and the soul instinctively tries to handle those weaknesses by either remorse or understanding. Both approaches work, depending on the specifics. Healing of the inner spiritual fractures and inclusions is usually done by a combination of remorse, acceptance of forgiveness, release of resent and blame, and understanding of truth. The low-energy substance is not released, it is absorbed into the rest of the spiritual body, which temporarily lowers the energy of the entire structure in the same way absorbing ice would cool down your physical body. This means your entire soul will feel pain of some kind during the process of absorption of the inclusions. The process is similar to the absorption of traumatic content encapsulated within a “larva”, where low-energy substance one was unwilling or unable to deal with was encapsulated within a membrane that isolates it from the rest of the spiritual body. Those membranes are inherently impermanent, and when they burst, the content is released into the spiritual body, creating trauma. If this trauma is absorbed and suffered through, the structure recovers and reintegrates on a higher level of functionality, because now there is no fragmentation and isolation of parts of one’s being into inaccessible regions. However, if trauma is unbearable, and one tries to shield oneself from it, another larva is formed in order to block the undesirable things from one’s consciousness. So, essentially, by accepting spiritual pain, living through it, with a combination of acceptance, remorse and understanding, one regains parts of oneself and is released from the necessity of existing in the energy spectrum that is lower than one’s maximum, because of the fact that higher energy would stress the larvas and inclusions to one’s breaking point. When those breaking points at the lower energy levels are removed, the entire structure can experience and absorb much higher levels of God’s light than was previously possible. Essentially, this reintegration and removal of low-energy inclusions, and raising the energy level of the entire spiritual body to the level of the highest-energy structures within the body, is what takes place in the process of evolution of the higher parts of the astral world, inhabited by the beings who already possess significant sophistication, complexity and purity. When the entire astral body attains uniformity at the highest energy level of the astral substance, apparently the entire structure crystallizes, it compresses into crystalline vajra form as it transcends the limitations of the astral world and goes beyond. This is basically the point I tried to lead my students towards, because once they get there, they are essentially out of the woods. Sure, there is spiritual growth even beyond that, but after that point one’s position is no longer precarious.

Another important issue is the motivator and mechanism of evolution in the astral plane. Incarnated human souls usually assume that without motivators present in the physical world, the souls would stagnate indefinitely in the astral world, and so the physical is useful as means for accelerating spiritual evolution. That, however, is not only false, but is in fact the direct opposite to the truth.

The logic goes like this: one feels comfort and is disinclined to change anything. At some point, discomforts and dangers of the physical world make him think and do things to avoid dangers and to assure his survival. The problem is, the most effective way to assure your survival in the physical world is to be the worst kind of a Darwinistic satanic animal, which by the way is also an excellent way of assuring your spiritual degradation and destruction. So, the only way to spiritually evolve in this world is to do all the wrong things, judged by the worldly criteria, because if you do all the “right” things, you’ll end up a spiritual abomination. In the astral world, however, the motivation isn’t negative. Theoretically, an astral “vegetable” can sit in the light all day and feel good, and this could theoretically go on for millennia without interruption. However, this astral “plant”, a simple aggregation of kalapas without much structure, which is able to experience only the basic, primal emotions, can also experience the existence of more sophisticated beings, who are able to interact, communicate, merge, share ideas, and eventually experiences discomfort due to its inability to do the same. This discomfort with one’s limitations is the main motivator of spiritual growth. It begins with perception, proceeds into empathy, and then into emulation, and with practice one acquires new abilities. Also, although God’s light is perceived by the simple spiritual beings as primal emotions – joy, pleasure, gratitude, fulfillment etc., it’s never just that. This light is also reason and intelligence and promise of greatness if you know more of it, and it is inherently motivating, it sort of pulls your toward and into itself, so basically the more you have it the more you desire it, and by “more” I don’t mean more of the same, but primarily the expansion of quality. There is pain, but its origin is in the awareness of one’s limitations in knowing more of God. So yes, this pain is also a motivation, because a spiritual being feels a special kind of pain when it sees that others can take from God something he’s yet unable to grasp, but it isn’t jealousy (defined as a desire for someone not to have more than you do) but its opposite (defined as a desire to be as good as those who are now better than yourself). You don’t want to allow others to be better than you, but not by limiting them, but by growing to match their high standards, and possibly even more, to be the shining example of God’s beauty and wonder for others to aspire to. So yes, there is a competition of a sort, between the spiritual beings – who will know more, who will do better, who will say the greater truth, do a greater deed, feel the purer emotion, and when one excels, others rejoice and applaud, and strive to do one better.